IPL is supposed to be a region-based franchisee playing a game of youngsters, where, incidentally, it's the veterans flourishing. Some observations:
RR is perhaps the only franchisee which has a quota for the old, physically challenged and the downtrodden. To elaborate, Martyn is way past his prime and Smith's fingers are always susceptible these days, but they still play ahead of so many others. The weak and under-nourished frames of all the local players (Asnodkar, Trivedi to name a few) explains the underprivileged quota.
The franchisee of the most regionally staunch state has imported the captain from Jharkhand. It also has arguably the biggest man hitting it with, unarguably, the smallest bat.
The 'Deccan' Chargers have Cuttack, Orrisa as the home venue. They also have VVS opening the innings.
Mallya has turned the RCB players in to a walking advert of every single liquor sold by him. Look closely, their helmet screams "White Mischief".
Can't poke at MI. It's captained by SRT.
Ganguly took a catch way better than anything he had snapped in his entire career. Talk about late bloomers.
DD has Mcgrath and Dilshan on the bench. Am I in the same universe?
Modi actually found someone to sponsor the absence of cricket (time-outs).
And here's the killer: The closest thing to a Sardar in Punjab's squad is Sreesanth.
And then there are the not-so-interesting things: DLF Maximum, Karbonn Kamaal catch, injuries, Angad Bedi (in stead of Mandira), Samir Kochhar, Ravi Shastri, Danny Morrison, Ashish Nehra... sigh...
Wednesday, 24 March 2010
Friday, 19 March 2010
RR Tragedy
I am sick of the IPL.
I love cricket and IPL but only when India and RR respectively are winning (Although I don't mind India winning the IPL or the RR winning a Test-match for that matter). But RR have now hit rock-bottom and I am glad I didn't go to watch the RR v/s RCB live last night. I'm sure I would have ended up in a Police Station on charges of assaulting Lumb or Martyn. I know my anger should be directed at those who bought them. But Warne got us the cup first up and Shilpa Shetty is ummm, well, Shilpa Shetty.
It all started with the typical 'bania' strategy they applied during the auction. Buying fringe-players cheaply worked once. But it did not in SA and doesn't seem to be working now. Add to that Smith's fingers. Dude, what's up with those. Seems like God decided to have a laugh by replacing a bull's horns with carrots. Not cool. Please take good care of them. Shilpa Shetty can advise you on the finer nuances of a manicure.
Then there's the not-so-curious, but sad enough case of Jadeja. He has now successfully proved that he's equally bad at switching franchisees as he is at switching ends while batting. Apart from an unconvincing win the other night, things look quite dismal for RR, unless...
Unless. That's the word the hopelessly optimistic (notice the oxymoron?) RR fan in me keeps muttering. Unless the team regroups. Unless Martyn sheds the artistry of a young Martyn and plays like an old Kallis. Unless Shaun Tait plays starts bowling like Maurice Tate. Unless Pathan remains Pathan in every match. Unless the shrewd Warney is 'setting-up' the other teams in to complacency and will bowl them around, over and between the legs now.
PS: Saturday's win gave me some hope but it's still a long way to go.
I love cricket and IPL but only when India and RR respectively are winning (Although I don't mind India winning the IPL or the RR winning a Test-match for that matter). But RR have now hit rock-bottom and I am glad I didn't go to watch the RR v/s RCB live last night. I'm sure I would have ended up in a Police Station on charges of assaulting Lumb or Martyn. I know my anger should be directed at those who bought them. But Warne got us the cup first up and Shilpa Shetty is ummm, well, Shilpa Shetty.
It all started with the typical 'bania' strategy they applied during the auction. Buying fringe-players cheaply worked once. But it did not in SA and doesn't seem to be working now. Add to that Smith's fingers. Dude, what's up with those. Seems like God decided to have a laugh by replacing a bull's horns with carrots. Not cool. Please take good care of them. Shilpa Shetty can advise you on the finer nuances of a manicure.
Then there's the not-so-curious, but sad enough case of Jadeja. He has now successfully proved that he's equally bad at switching franchisees as he is at switching ends while batting. Apart from an unconvincing win the other night, things look quite dismal for RR, unless...
Unless. That's the word the hopelessly optimistic (notice the oxymoron?) RR fan in me keeps muttering. Unless the team regroups. Unless Martyn sheds the artistry of a young Martyn and plays like an old Kallis. Unless Shaun Tait plays starts bowling like Maurice Tate. Unless Pathan remains Pathan in every match. Unless the shrewd Warney is 'setting-up' the other teams in to complacency and will bowl them around, over and between the legs now.
PS: Saturday's win gave me some hope but it's still a long way to go.
Fuzzy Logic??
I was tagged. So here it goes...
Why is the sky blue?
The sky - birds fly in the sky.
Birds - Birds lay eggs.
Eggs - I hope RR detractors end up with eggs on their respective faces.
RR - RR is partly owned by Shilpa Shetty.
Shilpa Shetty - oooohhhhh.
Ooooohhhh - It's the antonym of arrrghhh...
Arrrghhh - Biotechnology
Biotechnology - It's been called the next big thing for the past decade now.
Decade - India has a population census once every decade.
India - India's sports uniform is blue.
And hence, my dear friend, the sky is blue... Phew..
PS: If you read it, consider yourself tagged.. It's interesting
Why is the sky blue?
The sky - birds fly in the sky.
Birds - Birds lay eggs.
Eggs - I hope RR detractors end up with eggs on their respective faces.
RR - RR is partly owned by Shilpa Shetty.
Shilpa Shetty - oooohhhhh.
Ooooohhhh - It's the antonym of arrrghhh...
Arrrghhh - Biotechnology
Biotechnology - It's been called the next big thing for the past decade now.
Decade - India has a population census once every decade.
India - India's sports uniform is blue.
And hence, my dear friend, the sky is blue... Phew..
PS: If you read it, consider yourself tagged.. It's interesting
Friday, 12 March 2010
That special someone
If you think you are sad, pathetic and lonely, so much so that no body remembers your birthday, think again. There is someone who will. And that someone always remembers, without fail. Someone who doesn't have to rely on Orkut or Fb to do that.
That special someone doesn't even expect you to remember his in return. In fact, it knows you don't and doesn't complain about it, but never forgets yours and never asks for a treat either. And the ungrateful people we are, we take it for granted all the time. Even if we trust it to keep safe one of the most important things in our lives. Money.
Yes fellas, I am talking about your bank. Only people who never forget.
PS: Dont get me wrong guys. I am not a 12 years old girl, or a 25 years old one for that matter. I thank those who wished and doesn't matter if you didn't. Just an observation.
That special someone doesn't even expect you to remember his in return. In fact, it knows you don't and doesn't complain about it, but never forgets yours and never asks for a treat either. And the ungrateful people we are, we take it for granted all the time. Even if we trust it to keep safe one of the most important things in our lives. Money.
Yes fellas, I am talking about your bank. Only people who never forget.
PS: Dont get me wrong guys. I am not a 12 years old girl, or a 25 years old one for that matter. I thank those who wished and doesn't matter if you didn't. Just an observation.
Monday, 8 March 2010
Parliament behavior 101
They say that most great wars have been fought over women... It is true for India at least, with the one going on in the parliament right now...
I am sure these monkeys are trained by their respective party's more experienced monkeys before letting them mingle with monkeys from other parties. Some of the points the training stresses upon as I imagine:
1. Wear a kurta - a shirt gives the impression that you are educated. Something you certainly don't want to portray
2. Your verbal reaction towards the budget solely depends on your loyalties and not on your understanding of finance. For instance:
4. Never miss a chance to fiercely attack another party, by words or otherwise, but do it ambiguously. Just in case you need to switch your loyalties as fiercely to the party you fiercely attacked.
5. Mics, chairs etc. are all handy equipments. Build your upper body strength to use them effectively in a debate.
6. For reactions on bills, go to 2.
7. If the bill is about any sort of reservation, 6 is not applicable. In this case, you must cut across party lines, caste, race, ideologies and IPL loyalties to support it.
8. You can bypass 7 if you can find any scope of reservation within the reservation bill.
9. If you are in the opposition, verbal reaction is just not enough. If you are either well-behaved or old or both, you should stage a walk out. Else, go to 5.*
10. If you are in the ruling party and tabling a bill - Proximity to anyone carrying a mic or chair is potentially harmful. Build your upper body strength to defend yourself effectively.
* Do not stage a walk out condemning an on-going terrorist attack on the parliament. We don't want to go to the voting booth again. And we just might miss you too.
I am sure these monkeys are trained by their respective party's more experienced monkeys before letting them mingle with monkeys from other parties. Some of the points the training stresses upon as I imagine:
1. Wear a kurta - a shirt gives the impression that you are educated. Something you certainly don't want to portray
2. Your verbal reaction towards the budget solely depends on your loyalties and not on your understanding of finance. For instance:
- Ruling MP: The budget is good. Projections for fiscal deficit are double than last year
- Opposition MP: Fiscal deficit rose because of my party's policies. You people blundered big time by not focusing on inflation and letting it fall.
4. Never miss a chance to fiercely attack another party, by words or otherwise, but do it ambiguously. Just in case you need to switch your loyalties as fiercely to the party you fiercely attacked.
5. Mics, chairs etc. are all handy equipments. Build your upper body strength to use them effectively in a debate.
6. For reactions on bills, go to 2.
7. If the bill is about any sort of reservation, 6 is not applicable. In this case, you must cut across party lines, caste, race, ideologies and IPL loyalties to support it.
8. You can bypass 7 if you can find any scope of reservation within the reservation bill.
9. If you are in the opposition, verbal reaction is just not enough. If you are either well-behaved or old or both, you should stage a walk out. Else, go to 5.*
10. If you are in the ruling party and tabling a bill - Proximity to anyone carrying a mic or chair is potentially harmful. Build your upper body strength to defend yourself effectively.
* Do not stage a walk out condemning an on-going terrorist attack on the parliament. We don't want to go to the voting booth again. And we just might miss you too.
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