The Old Man & The Elephant

It's finally over..

Part 1

Once their lived a king,
as whimsical as... well, a king.
he had an elephant pet..
the animal would never trumpet...

a reward was declared for the one,
who could set off jumbo's siren...
Hordes of men tried their luck,
but gold was not to be struck...

Then appeared an old man,
with a limp in leg and staff in hand...
He hobbled around the elephant thrice,
and finally stood near his rear side...

All of a sudden he made his move,
sticking the staff up jumbo's groove
The elephant screamed like never before
and the old man left with riches galore

Part 2

An year had passed,
since the old man triumphed..
King's whims were at their best,
At the center of them, again, was the poor pet...

The task looked straightforward,
Just make him nod and shake his head...
Hordes of men again tried their luck,
but gold was still not to be struck...

Then appeared the same, old old man,
with a limp in leg and staff in hand...
He hobbled around the elephant thrice,
and this time, stood within his sight...

He then asked in jumbo's ears if he recalled...
The poor elephant responded with a nod...
He then asked 'Do u want more of the pain'?
The head shook and our old man won again...

BT Brutes:

Sass: Quit smoking daaa... I'm against the anti-tobacco drive

Doctors & Chemists

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

Go here.

INTRODUCTION

In today's world, buying medicines from a prescription slip is like delivering a steganographic letter. Even if you try to decipher it, you cant make out a single word. The best idea is to just hand it over to the chemist who knows the code and is the only guy who can crack it.

HISTORY

There have been incidents in history where an ignorant messenger has carried a letter containing the order for his own impalement. Times have changed. These days, a doctor's prescription can only instruct the chemist to screw the patient monetarily and that too should be only as much as he can bear and can come again for another round.

SPECULATIONS

We found that its quite possible that a doctor has struck a deal with the chemist... "I handle the complicated stuff and for the common stuff, I'll just send you a diagnosis in cryptic, and you give a medication you prefer, since it's too much for me to remember the remedy to all the diseases." The parallel to this phenomenon can be found in any college where two guys decide to cheat in an exam and either one crams up half the portion.

SUGGESTIONS/ALTERNATE PROFESSIONS

A doctor and the chemist who owns the shop just outside the clinic can be hired for secret services as a doctor written letter can only be cracked by the chemist so this is as good a message delivery system as any.

Doctors are our best shot at finding a cure for Alzheimers too. The obvious reason being that they are, after all, doctors. Another reason is that their handwriting can form the lowest level of comprehensible jots while creating a database. Get it? They are the threshold which separates Amitji (respect warranted) in Black and my thesis guide, making sense of whose scribblings consumed half the time I had allocated to my BTP (which was about 5 days, give or take 1), and who inspired me to carry out this extra curricular research work.

Ya.. I knwo teh lsat wrod in teh prveoius praa was mis-splet but taths dyslexia, not Alzheimer's...

RECOMMENDATION

On a serious note, I recommend that it be made mandatory for Doctor's to start using a notepad with grids and write one letter in each cell. I have seen a doctor doing that and it works.

REFERENCE

A few prescription slips.

The Ex

I know we have split...
I know we are over..
Had to happen one day...
It couldn't last forever...

Some time it will take,
to move on I thought...
Was I stupid but,
having not another one sought???

While I was reminiscing,
and thinking you felt the same way,
You were looking at a new sunshine
and were busy making some hay...

Did it take much to replace me?
or just a heartbeat and a blink???
Do you ever think of me,
when you are with him???

Another lesson that life has taught,
another lesson that I have learned...
Never promise exclusivity there,
never in a cup of tea, get your heart burnt..


Prologue: Achal a.k.a. Item found a new tea partner, after going steady with me for over 2 years... Understandably, I'm heart-broken...

Time to leave..

It's time to leave
This ain't a summer-break..
I am an engineer now,
an IIT Madras make..

No more profs,
no more classes,
No morelit-soc,
or scroeter clashes...

Nobody will be a macha
Nor will anyone be maroing pain
Arbit stuff shall now have order,
but I won't be known by my nickname...

Will be online always,
there wont be an internet ban...
but won't watch any sitcoms,
u see, there's no LAN...

No longer a cycle, bus,
or a long distance walk...
No KG, Tarams or Vels
no more a tea in the haze of smoke...

It's time to leave,
and time to say adieu,
it's sad, but thank God,
We'll have better girls to woo...

Viva

So... I am an engineer now.. well.. hopefully... gotta wait till tomorrow to know for sure...
I submitted my thesis and went through the viva which went surprisingly well... I intended to reminisce about my days here but now i figure i have already done that in my blog.. So what do i write about???

I pulled off a real fast one... perhaps the fastest one this year... less said, the better..
My thesis/report??? full of typos and other mistakes.. if i remember correctly, even the values dont match up and the code has a mistake too...

My room seems to be burying under dirt and dust for the last one month and my resolve to hasten the process only gets harder as final goodbye approaches...

I'm hooked to hitman these days..lets see how long it lasts...

Next mission... job hunt...

and oh... i also need to write the concluding part of this poem. hang on people, it will come and i can assure u its not worth the wait.. as if anything ever is...

Its time now i guess... time to grow up and start talking bout serious stuff when u dont have time to discuss the little intricacies of life... where u will be too busy to wonder why should a cricket team not have a kung fu fighter as the 12th man and make him field often. A school of thought says that they would raise the bar higher. This comes from a man who is himself an expert at kung fu movies and has spent majority of his time here downloading them and for me, his views on the subject are final...

Anyway.. its time to hit a general...
so long.. n thanks for all that was fishy...

Acknowledgement

I would like to express my gratitude to all those who helped me to complete this project successfully. Firstly, I want to thank my guide Dr. R.S. Verma for trusting me with this project. It is his unique approach of guidance that helped me in finishing this work successfully. At every stage in the project, he was always there to help and guide me through it.

I would like to extend my gratitude towards our HOD, Dr. K.B. Ramachandran for his flexible and understanding approach towards the students. I am grateful to the entire faculty of the department and otherwise, under whom I had the privilege to study and learn during the past 4 years.

At this moment I would like to thank the 'BT Gumbal', Achal, Deepak, Ujwal and the rest who helped me with my academics and were always willing for a round of tea at the most unlikely hours, an experience I am unlikely to forget.

A note of thanks is also warranted for Satyan, Sajal and many more friends, seniors and juniors in my hostel who stood by me through thick and thin for 4 years, and supported me immensely through the course of this project. I would also remember the fun times and the meals at nocturnal hours with Pratik, Anshul, Saurabh and Ravi while I worked on the project.

I am also obliged to Piyush, Kanishk, Shivangi, Rachit, Suhani, Swapnil and Himanshu for being my support outside these walls and keeping me calm and compose during difficult times.

I am deeply indebted to my family for being patient with me, for their unflinching faith and encouragement during the hard times and their support during the good ones.

Last but not the least, I pray to the Almighty to be as forgiving and caring for me as it has been for all these years.

ASHUTOSH BIHANI
BACHELOR OF TECHNOLOGY
IIT MADRAS
CHENNAI

and now a joke that was cracked a long time back:

Someone: We had a surprise quiz today

Me: how was it?

Someone: well, it surprised me...