Wednesday 15 July 2009

Ricky Ponting ko gussa kyun aata hai?

Mr. Ponting is fuming, behaving like a child whose candy has been snatched away. The frown which almost always accompanies him when touring India made an aberration and paid him a visit at Cardiff. Incidentally, the cause of the frustration was a spinner Sardar this time too, albeit with the bat.

In the post-match conference, Ponting blasted England's time delaying tactics, which included changing gloves, calling the physio and causing rain on the 4th day. He stated that apart from the rain, it was pretty 'ordinary stuff'. On further coaxing, he revealed that he won't report the incident as he felt that ICC should first take care of similar but bigger issues like the 'time delaying tactics' adopted by Indian govt. officials while constructing a bridge or a road.

He also publicly requested Arjun Singh to officiate in the next match as he was convinced the move will help hm squeeze in many more overs in the given time. It is believed that Lalit Modi was also in contention but Mr. Arjun Singh's ability to squeeze in 127 in the space of 100, combined with his 24x7 availability, since being dumped unceremoniously from the cabinet worked in his favour. Mr. Modi did not help his case by suggesting to squeeze in therapeutic breaks every 10 overs, where it would be mandatory for physios to tend to players, which seems to have left Mr. Ponting fuming.

When the conversation veered to 'spirit of the game', an over zealous reporter reminded him of the Indian tour when he and his mates ignored a pre-series agreement between the two sides and resorted to sledging, ultimately resulting in the Monkeygate scandal. Mr. Ponting responded graciously by explaining the terms of the agreement, but only after pointing out that the question was 'against the spirit of journalism'. Apparently, claiming grassed catches, prompting an umpiring decision or calling your opponents bastards was all well within the agreement. The only act excluded was calling someone a monkey. (weird country though, where calling someone a bastard is OK but monkey can wreak havoc.)

He went on (& on & on) to mourn the unfair treatment meted out to him every time he tours England or India. Since they can't win fair n' square, the English either put in a specialist fielder as a sub ('05 Ashes) or resort to time-delaying tactics. The Indians on the other hand, bring on Bhajji to bowl to him.

Just when yours truly was getting iffy with his rants, he signed off by warning England to behave themselves and start losing or else, the Aussies will fall back on a simple philosophy they have been using against the Indians. 'If you can't beat 'em on-field, beat 'em off it.'

Bizarre Bihanis

Dad (While watching one of those Hindi movies award shows): So many people from Bollywood are here. If someone bombs this place down, imagine how many newcomers will get a livelihood.

5 comments:

kay gee said...

nice satirical post that!

Aussies are such bad sportsperson.
In the latest Ashes Test match, the stipulated maximum amount of overs were bowled and even an extra half an hour wouldn't have helped the Australian cause.

Thank God, he didn't blame them for causing 'artificial rain' on the fourth day

Ashtung said...

ya.. i'm gonna put that now...

Rampy said...

always the cribber.
If you cant finish off Monty 'Passenger' in 11 overs, you don't deserve to win. simple.

you should look into his symonds like past of 90s too.

Anonymous said...

Bj aka Karan : sahi hai :)

Pratik Gupta said...

sau sunaar ki ek bhajji ki...anyways i don care his crying, weeping or any other act until he is not crossing sachin's score.
but i am desperately waiting for his autobiography -' and i cried again....'